Jason and Keesha lay
side-by-side atop the bed. Their
sweaty, spent bodies just barely made contact.
Panting, they both struggled to breath normally.
Gradually the intense
emotional high that Keesha had experienced began to wane, and all her deeply
buried reservations about the decision she’d made came flooding back.
After Jason’s biting comment about her talking too much, she was
hesitant to voice her concerns to him. Even
now, as they lay in the afterglow of sex.
“I never had sex
without using a condom and spermicide,” Jason announced into the silence.
Moments ago he had felt Keesha’s body stiffen beside him and guessed
that she might have regrets about what had just taken place between them.
“And I get tested for HIV regularly,” he added.
Keesha sat bolt upright.
This was yet another aspect of her decision that she had not taken into
account. She and Jason had just had unprotected sex, and she was not
on any form of birth control. Keesha
felt like an idiot. How could she
have been so reckless?!
She turned to Jason, who
now sat up watching her. A sense of
panic like an inferno began to consume any sense of calm she possessed.
Images of Jason engaged in sex with an endless parade of faceless women
swam in her head. “Oh, god,” she cried as a vision of a smirking Caroline
Benson became clear. If there was one person Keesha was positive had not been
sexually discriminate, it was Carly. Her
track record with Tony, AJ, Jason and Sonny was a matter of public record.
Carly had entered into a sexual relationship with each man while involved
with another. In light of this
fact, all Keesha’s other concerns seemed mundane.
“Keesha!” Jason’s
repeated utterance of her name cut through the panic.
He met and held her gaze. “I
did not have sex without using a condom and spermicide,” he repeated.
“Not…with…anyone,” he emphasized.
“Not ever.”
“HIV.”
The young woman gave a bark of sharp laughter.
“And here I was worried about whether or not you slept with me to
answer your curiosity!”
“I did.”
Jason observed the effect
his calmly spoken words had on Keesha. She
jerked back as if struck. “And
you did the same.” Jason shifted
on the bed so that he could look at her more freely.
His nakedness was of no consequence as he pulled the unresisting woman
near once more.
“You needed to know if
being with me was the same as being with him.” As usual, Jason referred to himself before the accident as a
totally separate being. “And I
needed to know if what Grandmother and Emily kept telling me was true.”
Keesha’s curiosity got
the better of her. “What did they
tell you?”
“That you and I had
something special.”
“And now?”
Jason rubbed his thumb
gently across Keesha’s full lower lip. “Being
with you was different than all the others.”
His blue eyes seemed to bore into the very deepest part of her.
“I don’t know what that means, but I do know that I don’t
just want to walk away from it.”
His simple honesty put to
rest all Keesha’s remaining doubts. Jason
had proven to her that the one thing she would get from him throughout their
relationship was honesty. Whether
their affair lasted one week, or the rest of their lifetime, Keesha would always
know where she stood with him.
“Neither do I.”
Finally at peace with her
decision to become involved with Jason Morgan, Keesha rose from the bed and
crossed over to her dresser. From
the third drawer, she removed an unopened box of condoms and extended it his
way. Jason tore the box open,
removed a single foil square and tried to return the rest. Keesha refused the gesture with a shake of her head.
“Keep them handy,” she said with a shaky smile, “I think we will
need them.”
